Adolescent Depression and Parent Communication

It is a given that adolescence is a developmental period marked by rapid changes. The child's social role expands beyond the family and relationships with peers begin to dominate. At the same time, biochemical changes are occurring that result in surges of physical and intellectual growth. It is no wonder that so many teens describe feeling stressed and pressured.

Despite the aforementioned factors, most adolescents tolerate the transition to adulthood without major problems and grow up to be well adjusted adults. In fact, research over the past ten years indicates that approximately eighty percent of all adolescents reach maturity without significant difficulties. Of the remaining twenty percent, many experience adjustment issues associated with a number of factors including family problems, peer relationships, and educational stresses. For some, the result is depression and normal development becomes derailed.

Depression in adolescence looks very much like adult depression. The teen experiences feelings of sadness, hopelessness, and lack of faith in a happier future. Eating and sleeping patterns may change; friendships and family relationships suffer, and grades at school begin to drop. In some cases, the depression lifts and life returns to normal. But when depression lingers, the adolescent's life course can be altered permanently, leading to school failure, substance abuse, and a dysfunctional adult lifestyle.

Fortunately, there are a number of steps that parents can take to help their teen overcome depression and return to normal functioning.

First, it is important to recognize that changes in the teen's biochemistry predispose them to experience problems with emotional regulation. This results in the adolescent feeling extremes of emotions more frequently than in child or adult populations. Some days can be like a roller coaster of emotional extremes. Because of this, adults sometimes react to the adolescent's expression of feelings with irritation and impatience.

Secondly, it is important to understand that these emotional reactions are very real and that sometimes just listening can be amazingly helpful to the teen. For example, because adolescents are very peer focused the loss of a best friend or first love is typically perceived as catastrophic. Even parents who are empathetic to the teen's grief can become impatient when the storms of tears, sleepless nights, and sullen attitude affect the family atmosphere. But if parents are not available, teens will find someone else to talk to. That someone else is usually another adolescent who is unlikely to have the loyalty, sensitivity, and wisdom necessary to be truly helpful. Furthermore, issues of trust frequently arise when secret confidences become Facebook commentaries

Parents have power. Parents need to understand that maintaining communication and emotional connections with their teen allows them to recognizer problems early in the process and intervene quickly, when necessary, to help the youngster cope with difficult events. Parents can be powerful influences for good by just being available to listen. And, finally, if parental support is not enough, the involved, observant parent can help the teen find professional help.

Adolescents want and need a degree of independence in order to accomplish their developmental tasks. However, caring parents maintain vigilance and step in to provide support when life's challenges overwhelm the adolescent's ability to cope.